Oh shit, I am going to be late! Okay what am I going to wear today?
It’s hot, I could wear shorts. Fuck no! Remember what your first creative director told you, “Shorts send the wrong message.” Wear shorts and flip-flops to the office and the CEO will think you’re an intern. The only way you can get away with shorts is if you’re good, really good.
Kakis and a dress shirt? Maybe. Untucked or tucked? Well if I tuck, I’ll look like a Xerox salesman. But if I go untucked, I’ll look like an AE.
I know, jeans and a black golf shirt. Perfect! Wait a minute. Didn’t the account sup say something about the client visiting today? Fuck, I can’t remember. Well I can’t risk it. A golf shirt doesn’t say creative and it doesn’t say business. It says I’m a moron who hasn’t figured out how to dress like a grown-up yet.
Hey what about a suit? Shit, I’ve never worn a suit to the office before. Maybe it would be a good idea. The CEO might see me and think I look professional. “Who’s that sharp looking copywriter over there? I like to see a creative dressed up every now and then. Maybe I’ll take him with me on my next client presentation.” Or he might think, “Looks like our copywriter has an interview today. I’d better pump up his salary.” Right, that’s gonna happen. If I wear my suit to work, my boss will just think that another one of my relatives died.
Maybe I could put together an outfit. Something rally cool, really creative. Let’s see, black jeans, ironic t-shirt, sport coat, and….cowboy boots. Oh yeah, that’s it. Now I look like the last douchebag at the bar at closing time.
Shit! Now I’m really going to be late. What am I going to wear? Jeans, shorts, pants, t-shirt, slip-ons, short-sleeves, long-sleeves leather jacket, sweater, Tommy Bahamas, baseball hat…
He was late.